I want to share with my readers a condensed article from the NY Times of January 2, 2011. The article called, “The Happy Marriage is the ME Marriage” written by Tara Parker-Pope, espouses an intriguing way for couples to improve the quality of their lives together by looking at their situation from a unique organizing lens.
Basically, the author states that couples can enliven and invigorate their partnership by striking out on their own to develop artistic, intellectual, and emotional pursuits outside the parameters of their couple life. The more each partner individuates in this way, the richer and more thriving their couple life will be as they are adding to the emotional and artistic quality of their communal life.
This simple technique can also be an anodyne to codependency which often results in symbiotic and uber dependent relationships.
A good cook adds spices and flavor to her cooking pot. How dull is a chicken soup without the zing of onions, carrots, etc. Activities, new social contacts and behaviors that had not been part of their identity before can sharpen the taste buds and wake up the appetite for the metaphorical dinner feast.
Ironically the feast can be more of a gastronomic treat than you could ever imagine.